Solo

I am sitting solo with sweet thougts of times I have enjoyed my space. Its like doing a solo dance with the audience captivated and the audience is me. The bottom line is no one is attached to us or owes us anything. As I stated in a previous blog post, "have no expectations". That is when you are hurt the most. Yes, it is nice to be loved and seen as special but not always realistic because we are individuals. We are accountable for ourselves. At some point you will be let down. There are levels to get to friendship and even romantic ones for them to be true. Otherwise, you get a representative and the whole WOW factor. Later, you are questioning where did that person go who sat me on pedistal and worshiped me hand and foot. It is the whole fantasy from Disney coming true. Then we think the whole relationship will be a Disney movie. Not realistic. I use to be the fairytale relationship type but now I want to develop real, genuine, authentic, relationships. Can you imagine how much pressure the other person feels to be so perfect for another person? I want the kind of relationship you do not see on media. The ones that survive the good and bad. The ones that do not pull from you.

People all play a part in your life yes, but sometimes stepping back and being solo is the way to go. Yesterday, I wanted to go to my favorite restaraunt. I called a couple friends but they were not available. That did not mean I had to go home. That meant it was time to roll solo and take me in. I felt so refreshed afterwards and again realized why I do so much on my own. I love my own company as well as others at times. Dont get me wrong I love the company of the good people in my life but there is a time to know yourself enough to be happy in your own company. After all you live in your own skin. Love yourself Babe!